I’ve been thinking about growth. Business growth, and personal growth. I’ve noticed that sometimes the things we talk to others about, or find ourselves coaching on, are just the things we need to think about for ourselves.
Looking in the mirror is always helpful, even if it’s sometimes uncomfortable. Let me share some reflections:
1. Find the patterns.
I often advise my coaching clients to keep a journal, and note things that they’ve learnt during the day or week. It’s a clearing kind of process, and most people get some real clarity. When I’ve done it myself, I’ve noticed patterns – things I thought I’d learnt, but somehow need to learn again; something I thought I’d fixed, but isn’t fixed in other people’s opinion.
2. Always seek clarity.
As a leader, I need to remember and constantly challenge myself: the number one role for a leader is to be clear. As Marcus Buckingham, Gallup researcher and leadership author said, clarity is the antidote to anxiety. That’s one I’m practising, how about you?
3. Trust in enough.
How do you know when you’ve done enough? When you’ve had enough? When you’ve given enough? When you’re good enough? When you know enough?
While the whole issue of ‘enough’ is often tied to a feeling of lack, it can also be triggered by a desire for abundance. There is an abundance of opportunity available to us. And too much abundance can be toxic. It can stress your system and overwhelm you. Giving too much. Taking ON too much. Taking IN too much.
So where in your business and life can you let yourself take a step back and trust in enough?
4. It’s all made up.
You’re feeling incredibly enthused by the challenges and opportunities ahead, right? Except when you’re not. When you’re chronically behind and snowed under by obligations and expectations. When the to-do list in front of you overshadows the ‘ta da’ list behind you. “I’m behind”. How many times have you said that this week? This month?
Well, here’s the thing. It’s all made up. You probably chose the deadlines and target dates. You chose the financial goals. You made it up. So are you really behind? Or have you just set unrealistic timelines? Are you really behind, or are you right where you need to be? Yep. It’s all made up. You’ll know in your gut if it’s true. Relax!
5. Tolerating irritations is a waste of potential.
Here’s a challenge. It’s useful to do at the end of a week, when the frustrations have built up far enough… or at the beginning of the week, when you don’t want them to build at all. Or frankly, any time you can feel the pressure growing.
Give yourself just 20 seconds to think of three specific situations where you’ve finished tolerating less-than. Less than you expect. Less than you deserve. Less than you paid for. Less than you need. Make a decision to put an end to it today, right now. Be done with tolerating what drains you, or derails you, or frustrates you and holds you back. Could be something you’re tolerating from someone else. Could be something you’re tolerating from yourself, deep inside. Whatever it is, get rid of it – stop tolerating, be done with it now.
Where can you reflect?
Do you ever hear yourself giving advice that you know it would be good for you to take? Are there aggravations in your working life that you can let go of to allow yourself to expand? Share in the comments below.
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This post is part of our Vintage Lyn Bicker series - powerful strategies drawn from decades of experience that form the foundation of our business.